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Clyde Eastside, better known as Meowfurryon Stormkitten, was a character role-played by shiny.

Description

Meowfurryon was a member of The Guild and worked at the Rooster's Rest. His legal name was Clyde Eastside but he usually went by the name of his D&D character, Meowfurryon, Archdruid of the Wild, Protector of the Grove, Defender of Everything Cute, Fuzzy and Soft, Part-Time Accatant, and Cat of the Year at Rooster's Rest. He was level 4 druid. Meowfurryon had the head of a cat and insisted that it was his actual head and not a mask. During a court case where he had to testify against Sam Baas however, Meowfurryon was forced to reveal that it was just a mask. He might have been a furry.

He used to have a bad habit of ignoring bathrooms and peeing whenever and wherever nature called, including inside the Rooster's Rest. Eventually, his fellow Rooster's Rest employees became fed up with his behavior and forced him to see a veterinarian who removed his "yarn balls". Meowfurryon had since been on a search to get them back, going as far as creating a private investigator persona.

The loss of his "yarn balls" made Meowfurryon significantly smarter since he's no longer busy playing with his balls. He became a successful accountant for the Rooster's Rest and helped out other businesses across the city as well.

Big Cat Rescue

Meowfurryon was also the founder and main operator of Big Cat Rescue, aiming to save all the cats of Los Santos. The plan was to incentivize fishing by implementing a generous payout system for fishermen that will lure citizens away from hunting. Big Cat Rescue accepted donations and unpaid volunteer workers for the future cat sanctuary. The operation was a money laundering scheme to cover up the illegal production of meth by higher-ups at the Rooster's Rest together with The Guild.

Major Events

All Cops Are Baas

One of Meowfurryon's favorite pastimes was causing harmless mischief by hiding in the trunks of unlocked cars, waiting for the oblivious driver to return and drive him around. On one occasion, he hid in the trunk of a police vehicle that was parked outside. From previous experience, he knew that it was possible to enter the police department through its parking garage, and his plan was to stay in the trunk until the car was parked in the parking garage, leave the trunk, enter the PD and shit in their dog bowl. This was all done to demonstrate his frustration that the police has K9 units but no Fe9 units.

The police car he had picked turned out to be Baas' and Dante's car. They didn't take him inside the parking garage as Meowfurryon thought they would, but instead drove around Los Santos. During this ride, Meowfurryon accidentally became witness to a confidential conversation about ongoing police investigations and Baas' and Dante's personal lives. This included knowledge of meth production and a RICO case being built against the Vagos. Realizing what he had stumbled into, Meowfurryon started taking notes on his phone in case any information would be useful later.

Shortly after making a stop at Burger Shot, Baas and Dante ran into Nino Chavez. Meowfurryon decided that this was the perfect opportunity to leave the car, and he started yelling for help, saying he had been kidnapped. Nino however drove off, leaving Meowfurryon alone with Baas and Dante who were now aware of his presence. Meowfurryon tried to explain that he had entered the trunk at Burger Shot but they didn't believe him. They were paranoid about what Meowfurryon had overheard and continued to interrogate him even after he asked for a lawyer. To attempt to get him to tell the truth, they took him to a torture chamber in Grapeseed where they poured water over him and forced him to leave his cat form. At this point, Meowfurryon thought that they were going to kill him.

When Meowfurryon refused to speak anyway, he was taken to the holding cells of a police station outside the city. Meowfurryon's phone was taken away from him and never returned, and with it all of his notes were gone. A lawyer was eventually sent to his cell but Meowfurryon didn't feel like the lawyer was on his side. Instead, he got the impression that Baas and Dante were trying to discredit him by pushing for a 51-50 on the basis that Meowfurryon believes himself to be a cat but isn't actually a cat person. Meowfurryon was then sent to prison.

Upon his return, The Guild, the emperors, and most of the city were appalled by Baas' actions and determined to serve justice, maybe more so than Meowfurryon himself. Baas was quickly suspended. Dean Watson allowed Meowfurryon to move into the suite above the casino where he would be safe. To further protect Meowfurryon, Lando Stormborn switched IDs with him since most people don't know Lando by his legal name, Keith Wanderlust, allowing Meowfurryon to create an undercover persona named Keith. In turn, Lando dressed up as Meowfurryon.

As a result of his trauma, Meowfurryon developed a fear of water bottles. Despite going to therapy, his mental state worsened further. As a coping mechanism, his brain temporarily shut out all memory of who had tortured him.

A criminal trial against Baas and Dante was scheduled and eagerly awaited by many, though Meowfurryon didn't particularly care about its outcome. When Meowfurryon was called on to testify, he was asked to describe the waterboarding, which caused him to panic. In order to accurately explain the waterboarding, he had to take off his cat mask and announce himself as Clyde Eastside, shocking everyone in the room. Judge Coyote found Dante guilty of obstruction of justice, accomplice of assault and battery, and accomplice of kidnapping. Baas was found guilty of assault and battery in addition to kidnapping. After the court case, Meowfurryon made amends with Baas, deciding to settle the civil case outside of court.

Although the criminal trial had mostly been a success, Meowfurryon was very upset about breaking character in the court room. With the act of breaking character, he had also broken the promise he had made to the Stormlord. Feeling unworthy of continuing life as Meowfurryon, he instead went by Clyde Eastside and refused to put his mask back on even after his Guild members made numerous attempts to console him and explain that breaking character was something they had all done at some point. Eventually, he put his mask back on and started referring to himself as Meowfurryon again but not because he felt worthy, it was simply to avoid upsetting his friends.

The Departure

In the days following the criminal trial against Baas and Dante, Meowfurryon’s behavior became more reckless. He was frustrated due to a lack of direction in his life, and mismatched schedules with the rest of The Guild that meant him and his Guild friends were rarely able to spend time together. Instead, Meowfurryon started hanging out and committing minor crimes with new people such as members of the Angels, a gang none of the other Guild members were close to. Lang, who was already upset with Meowfurryon for how little initiative he had shown in going after Baas, was further angered by this behavior. He offered to teach Meowfurryon about being a criminal if that was what he wanted to be, though yet again Meowfurryon showed little determination. He just wanted to have fun and try something new.

This worried The Guild as well, as they were concerned that reckless criminal activity with gangs they did not trust could put Talon in jeopardy. They decided to call a meeting where they warned Meowfurryon about his behavior and the conflict between wishing to commit crimes and his personal principles of not wanting to harm innocents.

Lang asked Denzel Williams to bring Meowfurryon along with him for a day in an attempt to convert Meowfurryon to a life of violence through “tough love”, and Denzel agreed. He brought Meowfurryon in his car and the two of them drove north. During the ride, Meowfurryon began to fear for his life, confiding in Denzel that he believed that Lang hated him and wanted to kill him, but Denzel said otherwise. Following this, Denzel pulled the car to the side of the road and shot several animals and locals, shocking Meowfurryon. He attempted to reason his actions to Meowfurryon by explaining how he sees the victims as loose ends that must be tied up, lest they end up getting himself killed.

Denzel then brought Meowfurryon to a gas station and demanded him to fill up the car with gas, but Meowfurryon refused, as he was terrified of Denzel and believed that he was crazy. Denzel attempted to get Meowfurryon to comply through punching and hitting him, but was unsuccessful. Meowfurryon only started to fill up the tank after Denzel threatened him with a gun. During this, Meowfurryon revealed to Denzel his standing within The Guild and his relationship with Lang, and how he felt that everything was uncertain.

With a full tank of gas, the two returned to the road and Denzel drove to the torture chamber in Grapeseed that Baas and Dante had taken Meowfurryon to. He forced Meowfurryon to sit in the chair that he was waterboarded in, and called Lang to ask for permission to waterboard Meowfurryon in order to get Meowfurryon to waterboard him in retaliation. However, Lang denied the request, insisting that Denzel stick to using “tough love”.

Denzel then took Meowfurryon back onto the road, and started to shoot and kill animals and locals again. In an attempt to gaslight Meowfurryon, Denzel claimed that Meowfurryon was complicit in these murders and that innocents were being harmed because of him.

Unfortunately, Denzel's efforts would backfire in the end. Meowfurryon stuck to his own moral code and decided that not only was Denzel a psychopath, but so was everyone else for going along with Lang's plan. Meowfurryon stood in the lake, he came to a realization that he can’t stay in The Guild, as their actions conflicted with his principles. Meowfurryon then stated “/gquit” out loud in front of Denzel, announcing his departure from The Guild. He then started to run away, and Denzel chased after him in a panic.

Now fearing for his life even more, Meowfurryon called the first person he could think of, Deputy Baas. He quickly came to Meowfurryon’s location. Denzel, spotting Baas' police cruiser tearing down the highway with its lights blazing, immediately broke off his chase and retreated as he trying to keep his record clean for the upcoming mayoral election. Having finally met with Baas, Meowfurryon told him that he had left the guild. This greatly alarmed Baas, and he called Olivia Copper to ask for her help. Once Copper arrived, they asked about why Meowfurryon was fearing for his life, and he tried to be as vague as possible, not wanting to implicate The Guild, Lang, or even Denzel.

Copper drove Meowfurryon back into the city, and the two of them ran into Lang outside of a 24/7 store. Meowfurryon went to go talk to Lang, entering his Bentley to do so. They started to drive around in order to talk. Meowfurryon explained that he had thought that Denzel was going to murder him and how he didn’t say anything to the police that would implicate The Guild or the members of Talon. As they took a turn off the highway and onto a dirt path through the forest, Lang asked if Meowfurryon had regretted calling the cops, and he responded with a no, and that he regretted getting into the car with Denzel earlier that day. Lang attempted to counter with bringing up how Baas had tortured Meowfurryon, but he explained that he forgave Baas because one cannot judge another based upon their actions in the past. When Lang asked about why Meowfurryon couldn’t forgive Denzel, Meowfurryon told him that he thinks that Denzel is simply insane.

Once at a bridge crossing over the Zancudo River, Lang ordered Meowfurryon to exit the car. He complied, and without saying a word Lang drove off into the night, leaving Meowfurryon behind. Meowfurryon then called Trey Romano, one of his closest friends. Trey came and picked Meowfurryon up, and Meowfurryon explained how he was scared for his life and that he quit The Guild. The two then engaged in a heartfelt conversation where Trey revealed how much he cared about Meowfurryon and that he had promised someone to protect him. He even said that if Meowfurryon was to leave the city, he would leave the city alongside him.

After everything that had happened Meowfurryon decided that the only option was to leave the city for an indefinite amount of time. He asked Trey to take him to the Los Santos International Airport. Once they arrived, Trey asked if Meowfurryon wanted him to come with, but Meowfurryon declined. He asked Trey to take a picture with him in order to tell others that he’s safe. Once he hotwired an airplane, Meowfurryon's last act before flying away into the night sky was to text Copper and inform her he was leaving Los Santos. This would not last, however...

Meowfurryon's Death

After only a few days, Meowfurryon returned to Los Santos with a plan. He was going to run for mayor as he could not allow someone as dangerous as Denzel to become mayor. Meowfurryon knew that he was in great danger and tried his best to stay hidden, but he was no longer afraid to die. He knew he had to stop Denzel, and if it was the last thing he did.

Once again, Meowfurryon got in touch with the police for his own protection and made a deal with Copper to send her a text message every night to verify he was well. If there were no more text messages, she would know that something had happened to him.

Despite his efforts to stay hidden, Stagdancer was able to track Meowfurryon down and eventually confront him. In a lengthy conversation, Meowfurryon explained that he no longer thought of The Guild as his family and that he needed to stop Denzel because he was unpredictable and insane. Stag, much like the other nerds and emperors would later, did not take Meowfurryon's concerns seriously and chalked it up to Denzel being a crazy uncle figure of sorts that would never actually harm Meowfurryon.

The Guild, being torn between friendship and Talon, advised Meowfurryon to have another conversation with Lang and clear things up. Meowfurryon felt that simply talking over the phone would not be enough, he wanted to meet Lang in person. To prepare for this meeting, he contacted Baas and asked for his help to arrange such a meeting in the safest way possible. The two were surprised by Lang who had found Meowfurryon on his own, so Meowfurryon had to flee. Feeling rushed, Meowfurryon scheduled an impromptu meeting with Lang in a neutral place later that day.

Final interrogation before Meowfurryon's execution

Lang was incredibly suspicious of Meowfurryon from the very start and assumed that he had brought police backup and broken the agreement to meet alone. Meowfurryon denied this. He was handcuffed and taken to the basement under Rooster's Rest where the nerds and the emperors interrogated him. In this emotionally draining conversation, the nerds desperately tried to dig for a solution that would prevent Meowfurryon's inevitable death, but there was no easy way out. Meowfurryon was not cut out for crime or for Talon and he knew too much. It seemed like his fate was already sealed.

None of them could understand why Meowfurryon had turned to Baas for help, the man who had tortured him, instead of contacting his Guild members, or anyone other than Baas. It is possible that Meowfurryon was suffering from Stockholm syndrome, thus always seeking Baas' human side and being more sympathetic towards him than others who also knew of his wrongdoings. Meowfurryon explained that he had forgiven Baas and that he felt Baas was not a bad person. Baas had helped him in many ways since the waterboarding incident. After being threatened by Denzel, Baas had simply been the first person that came to his mind. Meowfurryon did not attribute much meaning to calling Baas first and he didn't understand why everyone else harped on about this detail.

The Guild could not accept this answer. From their perspective, it looked like Meowfurryon was working together with the police and therefore a danger to Talon. Meowfurryon reaffirmed that he was not a snitch and had never told the police about who he felt threatened by, but giving Meowfurryon the benefit of the doubt or the possibility of Meowfurryon incriminating them in the future was not a risk The Guild and Talon could afford to take. There was nothing Meowfurryon could say or do that would change the fact that he had to die, and they all knew this.

The Guild and the emperors retreated for a final meeting and returned to kill Meowfurryon. A knife was passed around from Guild member to Guild member, each of them saying their last words and stabbing Meowfurryon.

After Meowfurryon's death, Copper was of course alarmed by the lack of text messages. She led the investigation of Meowfurryon's disappearance and started pulling away several Guild members for interrogations under the guise of wanting to hang out with them as friends. She was very suspicious and did not believe the nerds when they claimed not to know what was going on, but ultimately, the investigation hit a dead end.

Trivia

  • Meowfurryon was one of the most successful blackjack players in the city but unable to stop himself while he was up. He usually gambled until all of his winnings were gone.
  • Meowfurryon was addicted to playing Final Fantasy XIV. After his death he once called Lang Buddha from heaven and compelled him to come play, indicating he still plays in the afterlife.
  • Yeager was Meowfurryon's owner.


Played By: shiny
Characters: Greg WestsideHoney BunsChris BlockCock LeeClyde Eastside† • Mangle Dan


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