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Burt "Gloryon" Beans is a character role-played by Garek.


Burt is a role-playing nerd who plays the character of Gloryon, a cleric with healing abilities who is empowered by the stormlord Kord from the popular TTRPG Dungeons and Dragons. He hated to go out of character, and while in character would follow any instructions given to him so long as it was a quest with an objective and a reward, thus allowing him to "level up" in character.

Burt was adopted by Humberto Pecorino, changing his name to Burt "Gloryon" Pecorino.

He currently works at the Rooster's Rest and is an ordained minister.

He (formerly) owned an RV called the Big Big Carriage, or BBC for short.

He is involved closely with the operations of the Cleanbois.

Burt is a member of the NRPGNCLDSSA. (The Not-Racist Pro-Gay Not-A-Cult Latter-Day Saints of San Andreas.)

Gloryon has officiated two weddings, the first being the wedding of Gerard Hawthorne and Petunia Brookshire, the second was the wedding of two lifers, Zelaya Rodrigo and a lifer named Freddy, the wedding was partly a excuse for The Guild to smuggle drugs, weapons and alcohol into the prison.


Gloryon is an unassuming and friendly person. He is, however, sort of manipulative - having confessed to telling everyone, including strangers, that he loves them in an effort to gauge what type of person they are. Once someone has his trust and loyalty, they can depend on him to stick up for them and defend them.

Gloryon tends to be a hardworker, which has been demonstrated throughout his tenure at the Rooster's Rest and through his work in it's other subsidiaries, Rooster's Ranch and Rooster Cab Co.. Additionally, he has exhibited talent when it comes to perfecting meth purity levels.

After his father left the city gloryon started stating and exhibiting Father Issues, accentuating his eagerness to please.


Humberto Antonio Donato Pecorino [Adoptive Father]

Gloryon, along with the rest of The Guild, were hired on to work at the Rooster's Rest by Don. Since then, Don has adopted Gloryon as his son, and the two share a close relationship. Gloryon frequently calls his father to keep him updated on things that he might have missed or to bring his attention to things that need his attention (such as his wife getting stabbed, for example).

Outside of their familial relationship, there is a solid friendship and respect between the two.

Annie May [Adoptive Mother]

Annie is the wife of Don Pecorino and Gloryon's adoptive mother. They frequently spend time together and have only gotten closer since the adoption. Annie frequently has Gloryon as a ridealong on her Uwuber rides. They also check in on one another.

Gloryon typically looks out for Annie and tries to fix situations that she gets herself in (trying to give her advice about dealing with Lang back when tensions were higher, and he also came in clutch when she got stabbed by 'Shia Labeouf).

Shelly Smith [Ex-fiancée]

Gloryon originally got engaged to Shelly Smith from Burger Shot after they went on a Romeo and Juliet type of date, during the time when the first rivalry between Rooster's Rest and Burger Shot was raging due to Kevin Whipaloo's extreme actions. Shelly, having been fond of him, instantly accepted his proposal, and everything seemed like it was going well between the two.

This relationship did not last, both due to the two often not having time for each other but more importantly due to Gloryon being wary of Shelly ever since she attempted to induct him into her personal cult, the IBS. They then had a bloody breakup, during which Gloryon shot her after she threatened his family at Rooster's Rest. This caused Shelly to hold a grudge against him, one which turned violent after she, her new fiancée Jeffrey Price, and Glue Guy kidnapped Gloryon and took him to an island where she stabbed him. This incident reignited a second season of tensions between the two restaurants, with Lang Buddha saying he would kill her and Harry Brown throwing a molotov inside Burger Shot.

Fiona Stewart [Adoptive Mother]

After his father left Gloryon started 'Mom-stacking', Fiona adopted Gloryon and this marked the start of 'The Scamily'.

Gloryon and Fiona have a caring albeit physically abusive relationship with Gloryon suffering repeated injury.

Gloryon acts like a very needy child who is willing to please his mother.


  • "Very well."
  • "I love you."


Played By: Garek
Characters: Burt "Gloryon" PecorinoKidd BeansGarekingle Dan