Ernie Sterfernie

Ernie Sterfernie is a character role-played by erniesterfernie.

Personality
Ernie Sterfernie has a traditional military outlook and attitude towards the world, and tries to take a step back and analyzing situations calmly and logically. On the other hand he is not confident and when put under heavy pressure he buckles almost instantly. He has a way of panicking and making the absolute worst decision possible in every high intensity situation. His military upbringing help to counteract this, but since his father passed away and his estrangement from his mother, he has lost all confidence and these issues have become more apparent.

In his adult life, after high school, he was introduced to illicit drugs by his best friend at the time, Michael Cullens, and became a recreational user. He had known Michael since he was a child, and had no idea that his family was at the head of a huge underground drug ring and had very high quality drugs that they basically provided him for free. During college, Michael and his family were arrested for drug trafficking, and due to their arrest, Ernie was cut off from his lifelong drug connect.

Ever since his increased drug use and loss of emotional stability Ernie also suffers from anger issues and is prone to violent mood swings when angered. While he usually tries to logically react to situations he is becoming more of a 'loose cannon' over time and the mood swings seem to only escalate each time they occur. It seems like the older he gets the worse these problems become.

Even though he seems to be alone all the time, Ernie Sterfernie is deathly afraid of being alone both in the relationship sense and in the physical sense. He will therefore try to make friends and hold on to them by any means possible, even if that is detrimental to Ernie's well-being or mental health. Ernie also has abandonment issues he needs to work out, since his best friend was arrested and sentenced to an extensive prison sentence for drug trafficking. Ernie's drug use has not helped these problems to go away and in fact has intensified them.

Background Information
Ernie was born to a traditional middle-class military family in upper San Francisco bay on December 23, 1985. His father was a Colonial in the Army and his mother was a waitress at the local diner. His childhood was relatively uneventful and he lived a standard American life. He studied Criminal Justice at a state college in San Francisco where he initially had good grades and attendance. He met a few local musicians one day and began playing in their band as its bassist.

At the age of 20 and while in his sophomore year at college, his father passed away in a car accident. Ernie's family was close for his whole life and this sudden change severely affected Ernie: his grades at school declined, his social interactions almost completely stopped, and he became more involved in drugs. During the next two years his mother would move on a remarry, which Ernie saw as disrespectful towards his dead father and he distanced himself from his remaining family. He dropped out of college basically in his junior year, left his band just as they were about to sign a record deal, and moved to Los Santos to try and have a happier life.

In The City
The very first thing that happened to Ernie after getting his fishing license was being taken hostage by Irwin Dundee. Ernie was riding his rental Bison towards Pillbox for medical treatment when the Bondi Boys pointed a gun at him and took him hostage. A sweaty Ernie was transferred to Dundee after the initial kidnapping and he was insulted for being stinky by Dundee on the way to a bank robbery in The Bay. Ernie learned from a gangmember known only as "Levi" to Ernie that Ernie could potentially be his Father, a fact Ernie cannot dispute due to his excessive drug use. After Officers PP, Fingle Dan, Anita May, and Kyle Pred showed up the robbery hit a snag when no thermite was initially available to Dundee, however he loudly negotiated his way into getting the job done. Ernie was left shaken, but unharmed.

After being kidnapped by members of the Street Team, Ernie began wondering if he could make money by being a hostage after cops did not show up to the safe cracking and Ernie was given money for his troubles. He now puts up an ad on the yellow pages as a "Professional Hostage" and offers varying rates for different hostage related services. Since he is attempting to become a lawyer Ernie is curious to see if he can successfully argue that selling his services as a hostage are legal under the law and will attempt to get out of any accessory charges if caught.

While making money doing low level civilian jobs like fishing, Ernie noticed a twat put out by Windsong that exposed the corruption of The Senate to everyone and called for a hunger strike to protest their dictatorship. Ernie heard the call and drove to the courthouse with his joints and stop sign to join the protest. When he arrived he saw Windsong, Droid, and a few other Smoke on the Water employees putting up tents and protesting outside the court house. He heard Windsong's pleas and was convinced into joining the Revolution, he would cast off the weight of eating and replace it with smoking joints for power, even if he was borderline treasonous. Ernie stayed, protested and used his powerful stop sign to help people listen to Windsong's decree against The Senate. There was a small orgy (only four people) that Ernie and Windsong participated in as to pay tribute to the spirit of the protest. The strike ended peacefully by it is far from over.

Ernie, needing money for a tow truck and personal vehicle, continued doing civilian jobs and started growing his own weed. His first strain was Crystal-Alabaster-Geek: An uplifting Sativa blend that energizes while hitting hard but keeping you clear enough to perform basic tasks. He also was introduced to a fellow civilian named Mustard who works at the Yellow Jacket in Sandy Shores. Since it is not inhabited most of the time except by locals, Ernie and Mustard got very drunk and began doing Dodo Deliveries with Mustard. On the way to the first run they had a close encounter with Officer Chris Kross but were able to get out with just a warning and avoided a sobriety check. After the deliveries Ernie and Mustard managed to get distracted from going to UwU Cafe and destroyed Mustard's car on the beach at Palimino Highlands in search of shipping container goods. They were eventually saved by Tow God Remy Pena who was able to majestically climb the mountain, get the car on the beach, and take the two to Hayes Auto's for repairs.

Personal Vehicles
Ernie drives either a stolen BMX or a rented Bison around Los Santos.

Quotes

 * "I'll be slippery!"
 * "Stop the hate,"

Trivia

 * When guns are pointed at Ernie he gets nervously sweaty. This can also cause an uncomfortable smell.
 * Ernie is a gambling and drinking addict, but not very good at gambling. He tends to lose most of his money at the casino.
 * Ernie can usually be seen holding a stop sign that Street Team gave him, saying "Stop the hate".