Key Bump (film)

Key Bump is an upcoming American action crime drama film written and directed by world-renown East Berlin hair stylist and filmmaker James Marco St. Marco.

Cast
 Main 


 * Leonardo Day-Lewis as Ricardo “Miguel” (maybe it does not matter), a perpetual under-achiever dissatisfied with his failing life.
 * Bradley Kickass as Leonardo's stunt double.
 * Hubcap Jones as Ricardo's estranged father Miguel, a successful criminal and strip-club owner.
 * Mr. K as Fat Tony (aka Big Gay Tony, Gay Fat Tony, Fat Gay Tony, Gay Tony, Mr. Tony), a higher-up criminal kingpin with past associations with Ricardo's father.
 * Lara Crotch as a dancer at Miguel's club. She previously showed no interest in Ricardo, but notices a change in his demeanor after his foray into crime.

 Supporting 


 * Morgan Reid as Ricardo's girlfriend, a popular OnlyStans sex worker.


 * Pilbis Shonly as an enthusiastic extra. Briefly appeared in the infamous break-up scene at the Pier.
 * Yakhov Goldstein as the rude and antagonistic Burger Shot customer who prompts Ricardo's journey.

Plot
[insert previous scenes]

Ricardo returns to his father's club, where he catches Lara's attention. She gives him a dance and comments on his changed demeanor. Ricardo exaggerates his first drug deal in an attempt to impress her. The two take ecstasy and make love against a billboard, resulting in an unplanned pregnancy.

[scenes not yet filmed]

Ricardo, now a lost and broken man, returns to Lara seeking insight and comfort. Lara throws up, confessing she is pregnant. The two run off in separate directions, unable to handle their dilemma. Upset at the idea of becoming a father, Ricardo jumps off a bridge and gets run over by a truck. He miraculously survives.

Miguel appears at Ricardo's hospital bedside to comfort his son. The two sob and profess their love for each other. Ricardo confesses that Miguel is going to be a grandfather, and then insists he will become the best drug dealer that the town has ever seen. He delivers the film's tagline, "I only need..... one hit."

[add more scenes]

Pre-Production
With the COVID-19 pandemic wreaking havoc on the economy, American film executives had depended on Tenet to save the movie industry. After the colossal box-office failure of Tenet, a desperate Hollywood turned to the only person who could do what Christopher Nolan could not: world-renowned East Berlin hair stylist-filmmaker James Marco St. Marco.

On February 5, 2021, Saint Marco boarded a plane to Los Santos. His assistant, Hanz, was supposed to travel with Saint Marco but contracted a SERIOUS case of rabies and was unable to join Saint Marco.


 * Marco claims funding was lost because he "loaded the money into a t-shirt cannon and fired it at a bunch of Bolivian orphans;" however, an investigation into the matter revealed that Marco had blown the budget on an exploding monkey in a plane crash scene.
 * After losing funding, Marco and Dorado had been spotted committing grand theft auto of several vehicles over the course of 2 days to use as their production transportation.

Struggling for cash, James Marco and Leonardo become garbagemen on February 7 to make money for the film.

Filming
Filming began on February 6, 2021, on location at Burger Shot.

[Listed chronologically in order of filming, not of final placement in movie.]

1. Ricardo quits/gets fired from his minimum wage job.

 * Filmed on location at Burger Shot.
 * Originally featuring Douglas Buck (role-played by Trainwrecks) as the antagonist who prompts Ricardo's exit. Problems occurred during filming, so Yakhov Goldstein took over the role of antagonist.
 * [Burger order ] [Leos breakdown ]

2. Being robbed and detained during an armed altercation.

 * Spontaneously filmed outside Pillbox Hospital during an armed standoff between Jordan Steele and two other men.
 * [Part1 ] [Part2 ]

3. Visiting Ricardo's estranged father.

 * Filmed outside the Vanilla Unicorn, featuring Anto Murphy as the Bouncer.
 * [Part1 ] [part2 ]

4. Confronting Miguel in his office & getting a referral to Fat Tony.

 * Filmed inside the Vanilla Unicorn Strip Club office, featuring Hubcap Jones (role-played by MikeTheBard) as Ricardo's estranged criminal father Miguel.
 * Long scene [starts 03:15:00 ]

5. Ricardo and his girlfriend break up.

 * Filmed at the Pier.
 * Featuring Morgan Reid (role-played by Appleshampoo)
 * Long scene [Starts at 03:53:00 ]

6. Meeting with Fat (Gay) Tony. (NSFW)

 * Shot on a luxury yacht during a wild sex party.
 * Several of the descriptions for Fat Tony were improvised, leading to confusion about whether he was Fat Tony, Gay Tony, Fat Gay Tony, Fat Tony Gay or Big Gay Tony.
 * Featuring Mr. K (Rollplayed by LordKebun) as Fat (Gay) Tony
 * [Part 1 Starts 04:27:30 ][Part 2 starts 04:30:00 ]

7. Rooftop & car stunt scene.


 * Scene heavily features Bradley Kickass as Leonardo's stunt double.

8. Drug deal scene.

9. Lapdance, sex scene, pregnancy reveal.


 * Shot on location at Vanilla Unicorn Strip Club.

10. Bridge jump


 * Cops and paramedics showed up to the scene, responding to multiple reports of a film crew trying to kill a guy. After clearing up the misunderstanding, the scene is filmed in 3 takes.
 * Hubcap Jones happens to walk by during the third take, and is brought in to film the emotional Oscar-bait hospital scene.
 * [Take 1][Take 3]

11. Hospital scene.


 * ["I only need..... one hit."]

Controversies
The lead actor notoriously had a controversial acting position in his last film.